On Any Given Day

On any given day, Korea is weird. It's just a different culture. People think differently, react differently and have different opinions than you'd expect. We're so used to it, that it almost never registers any more. But, today, when Mel and I were talking with each other about our days, we realized not only how weird it is to be a teacher sometimes, but also how weird our everyday lives have become. 6 things from today:

1. As my afterschool class was wrapping up, I quickly went over the vocabulary my students needed to know for their homework. One of the last words was "pet" (as a verb). I petted Daniel's head and asked the kids if they knew anything else you can pet. Ryan had an answer. He leapt up and rubbed his crotch: "I can 고추 pet!". The crowd loved it. Ryan's six years-old.

2. In the same afterschool class, Ryan tattletaled to me that Daniel was speaking Konglish. Konglish is a weird sub-language of Korean. It's basically just Korean mispronunciations or misuses of English words like, for example, "fighting!" (used sort of like "go, go, go" or "hurrah"), or "handpone" (used instead of "cellphone").

Ryan, I am much more concerned about your classroom 고추 petting than I am about Daniel's Konglish!!

3. Tomorrow is Teacher's Day. Of course, there is no such a holiday in Canada (unless you count the last day of school, which I'm sure all truthful teachers consider to be their special day), but there should be. Teachahs are important, yo.

Melodie and I are both in positions at our schools that nobody cares about. She doesn't give her kids any substantial grades, so she doesn't need to be bribed with gifts. I don't have a homeroom class this year, so the same goes for me. However, I was surprised to receive some stuff from my afterschool students: flowers, chocolates, a bag full of bread and juice, cards and a $50 (!) gift certificate to Coffee Bean. The best gift, though, had to be from little Wanny. Every day he pokes his head into my classroom during my prep hour to say good morning. It's really cute. Anyway, today he runs in with a single, opened sheet of Pororo stickers that he brought from home. "Happy Teacher's Day!" he said. When you're 4-years-old, a sheet of stickers is very valuable! I will stick them somewhere very nice.

4. Today, Melodie was teaching her class about giving suggestions. In a game, she asked for a suggestion about what she can do if she's hot. One boy yelled out, "Take off your clothes!" He was thirteen. Totally appropriate.

5. On her way home from work, Mel was crossing the road from her school to get to her bus stop when a car stopped suddenly in the middle of the road. The driver's side window rolled down.

"Do you believe in Gaw?" the driver asked.

"What?" Mel replied.

"Do you believe in GAW?" the woman repeated.

Cars behind them started to honk. Mel's students, who were crossing with her, were watching everything. The driver offered Mel a book. Mel started to take the book, but the driver held it firmly, waiting for an answer to her original question.

"I'll take it," Mel stammered, as the car drove off and she walked away with a 64-page book about God the Mother. Koreans LOVE God! 9 times out of 10 if someone approaches me in Korea, and they're speaking English, it's because they want to talk about God. And this is the third time Mel has been approached about God the Mother. The last time, the women who approached her even had a DVD player with them on the street and expected her to watch a religious video right there on the sidewalk. Yeah, no problem, got some popcorn too while we're here?

6. For supper tonight we ate at a Mexican restaurant and my quesadilla had PINEAPPLE in it. I should start stopping people in the roads and questioning them about THAT.